Not What It Looks Like
by hannahncakes
Summary: River comes to resuce the Doctor but they get slightly distracted by her outfit. It's not what it looks like, honest. Set during a rather adult episode of "Let's Kill Hitler". One-shot. Smut.


What It Looks Like.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but I try to manipulate it to please all you lovely people.

_Author's Note: So this is for Laura & Toni my wonderful & dirty-minded friends. They found out that River appears in Nazi get-up during Let's Kill Hitler and then this happened. Look at the rating. Look at the prompt. Decide if you want to read that kind of thing and don't moan to me if you don't :p Other than that… Enjoy!_

"I would like to speak to the prisoner." A harsh female voice came from outside the door and the Doctor looked up sharply from the chair he was tied to. There was something vaguely familiar about that voice but he couldn't put his finger on exactly what it was. "Alone." The voice snapped as the door open and he glanced up to see the silhouette of a woman walk quickly through and push the door shut behind her, leaning against it and breathing heavily. He stared at her for a second as his eyes adjusted once again to the dark room after the brief exposure to the light outside.

"You'll never get me to talk." The Doctor muttered quietly as he glared in the general direction of the woman who blocked his only exit.

"That's what they always say." The woman laughed as she walked towards him, her heavy German accent seemed to be fading with each word. He craned his neck to see her but her face was obscured by the hat she wore at a rather fetching and jaunty angle. If she wasn't, you know, an evil Nazi who had imprisoned him then he'd rather like that hat. "But I have ways of making you talk." She laughed cruelly as she stopped just outside the pool of light that encircled his chair. "Wow, I've always wanted to say that! Hello, sweetie."

"River?" He gasped as she stepped forward and removed her hat in one fluid sweeping movement that reminded him of some awful films Amy made him watch one when a woman lets her hair down and she's suddenly attractive with her hair swishing everywhere. Which River was doing a very good impression off right now as her hair bounced and caught the light in all the right places. Not that she wasn't normally attractive, hat or not she was a very… The Doctor shook himself mentally. He was rambling. This was a very non-good train of thought to be having right now. "River… Are you a Nazi now?"

"Oh yes, nice to see you too. No 'how are you today River', no 'thank you for breaking in to save me River', no 'once again you're risking your life for me River'… No. All I get is 'are you a Nazi now River?'" She grinned and rolled her eyes as she walked even closer to him and placed her hat on his head, laughing as she did.

"Well you are wearing a Nazi uniform." The Doctor muttered sulkily, as if this explained everything.

"Yes dear well I am undercover. One has to wear these kind of things." River laughed. "What do you think?" She asked as she held out her arms and twirled slightly as the Doctor let his eyes wander down her body for the first time since he'd seen her. She wore a very tight fitting skirt that stopped just before her knees and a blazer that almost burst at the buttons because it was so tight and caused his eyes to linger for a little too long on her breasts that seemed very exposed underneath it.

"You look very urm… Nazi-like." He finished lamely and coughed as he tried to drag his eyes away from her chest.

"Nazi-like? Is that the best you can do?" River asked as she moved closer to him, her legs falling either side of his restrained body as she sat casually on his lap and threw her arms behind his head.

"Well yes… Nazi-like and urm… Well, I shouldn't like it. I really really shouldn't like you wearing this." The Doctor gulped.

"But…?" River grinned as she leant forward and placed her forehead against his gently.

"But I think I do. And I think that… Are you not wearing a shirt under that suit River?" The Doctor gasped as he looked down quickly.

"Well… No. It was a rush to get ready. All big rushing to save your life and that, not too much time to worry about shirts and the like." River laughed.

"So you're urm… You're just wearing the suit?" The Doctor coughed.

"Well, I have _something _under there." River laughed. "Do you want to see what it is?"

"I would very much like to." The Doctor raised his eyebrows at her. "But I'm slightly… urm… _restrained._" The Doctor shrugged as he lifted his arms to illuminate the ropes that tied him down.

"Oh yes. I suppose I should do something about that." River laughed as she reached into her jacket pocket and recovered a pen knife which she used to slice quickly through his ties.

"Well now that's much better." The Doctor grinned as he wriggled his free hands and gingerly placed them on River's waist as she sat in front of him.

"So, you going to investigate what's under my uniform then Doctor?" River muttered seductively as she bit on her lip.

"Well I suppose I could but shouldn't we be, kind of, leaving all ready?" The Doctor asked nervously.

"It's okay. They won't come in to check. They're all too afraid of me." River smirked as she ran her hands through his unruly hair and he groaned slightly.

"Well then I suppose I could…" His hand hovered vaguely around the hem of her skirt while the other one danced across the buttons of her jacket teasingly. "but we really need to get out of here."

"No. I think you really need to do this." River growled as she grabbed his hands and placed them on her breasts forcefully. "It is very important."

"Well if you put it like that…" The Doctor grinned as he fumbled with the buttons on her jacket nervously, popping them open to reveal a silky black bra barely concealing her breasts underneath. He moaned slightly as he moved his hands downwards so they slid under her skirt, roaming all the way up her exposed legs until they brushed gently against her knickers. "You are a very bad girl, River Song." He growled as he pulled her closer towards him. She whimpered slightly as her mouth crashed down onto his and she felt his hips buck up against her. She ground her hips against him, hungry for the contact, as he twisted one hand into her hair while the other roamed her body caressing her exposed skin.

"I am. Very very bad." She whispered as her hands snuck under his waist band, undoing the buttons on the front of his trousers as he closed his eyes and let his head drop down onto her shoulder- biting greedily at her collarbone as he did. She wriggled herself on top of him and pulled her skirt up even further so he could enter her.

"River…" He moaned as she began to move on top of him, her hands gripping his shoulders tightly as he threw his head back in ecstasy. As she moved faster and faster he let his hands grab hard at her exposed breasts and ran his fingers across her hardened nipples.

"Oh Doctor. My Doctor." She almost whispered as she thrust herself against him, feeling her climax building. She groaned gently, pulling his hair and kissing him fiercely as she felt the heat build inside her . She bit down hard onto his lip as she felt the first wave of her orgasm crash through her and then almost instantly felt him come with her as she tightened around him.

"What the hell are you doing?" They heard a harsh male voice call out as the both spun around instantly, still panting heavily. In the doorway stood a heavily armed guard who was looking at them as if he'd never seen anything so despicable in all his life.

"Well I was… Interrogating." River muttered quickly, not moving from her position on the Doctor's lap. "And it got a bit… It's not what it looks like!" She finished quickly.

"I think it's exactly what it looks like." The guard answered angrily as he began walking forwards.

"Bugger." River muttered as she grinned down at the Doctor. "I'd really hoped that would work. Oh well." She lunged forward and grabbed something that was stuck under the chair. In a heartbeat she pointed the gun at the wall and blasted a hole in it, securing their route to freedom. "Looks like its plan B then." She laughed as she grabbed the Doctor's hand and pulled him towards the escape route.

"You are unbelievable, you know that?" The Doctor laughed as he ran after her, hastily fastening his trousers as he went.

"Oh I know!" River grinned as she pushed them both through the gap in the wall and then quickly sealed it after them. "It's fun though, don't you think?" She smirked as she leaned up to kiss him quickly.

"Is it always like this when you're around?" The Doctor gasped as she pulled away.

"Oh yes." River laughed heartily as she reached for his hand and they began to run.

"Good. I can't wait." He smiled as he gazed across at her. He hoped she had to rescue him more often. Especially if there were outfits involved.

**Reviews are just amazing.**


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